High School Daze

Some well-meaning friends once told me I’d miss High School once I was pardoned.

I’m still waiting for that to happen.

After all, there were lots of those once-in-a-lifetime moments you can never—with any luck at all—relive. Like staring at the INSIDE of a locker, or learning to sing Jingle Bells in falsetto while standing atop the radiator in the boy’s bathroom. Or being tossed into the girl’s bathroom. Who knew High School girls could shriek that loud? And if you need a number as to how many it takes to jam one freshman’s head into a toilet, it’s three. Er, so I’ve heard.

It’s the little things like that that made High School special. Especially for those of us who were dorks. Ok, I’m still a dork but I’ve learned to embrace me inner dorkiness. Which usually is also my outer dorkiness. Don’t laugh. Someday we’ll have the word “dorkilicious” in the dictionary. Really.

And then there were the other things of a slightly more malicious nature that just makes me want to go running back to my HS reunion. Like the girl who said yes to a date but accidentally forgot to tell you that psychotic two-hundred pound guy with the Firebird and firearm collection was her boyfriend. Oh, yeah, memories. Bet they’re married now. Or at least were. Or will be as soon as his twenty years are served.

And do you know just how hard it is to pull a quarter out of your…um, nevermind…

Anybody sensing a bit of sarcasm here? It’s funny looking back. Sorta. Well, in a maladjusted, gonna-take-a-lifetime-to-get-over-it kinda way.

But at the time? Not so much.
Anybody else wish they were back? ;)

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