When Dreams Attack

The other night I dreamt I was being chased by midget cheerleaders.

Naked midget cheerleaders.

With big pom-poms.

Makes you sorta ponder the deep philosophical symbolism and implications of your dreams, doesn’t it?

It does me. I was running away from them, but my legs had that weird dream quality—you know, like you’re running through molasses. And they were running full on, their little legs pumping and their pom-poms bobbing.

Then it dawned on me there was nothing to be afraid of. So I let them catch me. I would relate what happened next…but I woke up. Smiling. A lot.

So after spending an hour analyzing the implications of that dream, beyond the obvious, I had to wonder if we all don’t tend to run from things sometimes—out of fear of success or deserving pleasure—without really thinking about how enlightening new and perhaps, er, stimulating situations and experiences—emotional, sexual or intellectual—might be for our personal growth.

Is that what these naked little nymphets were trying to tell me? Are dreams, no matter how ludicrous, a chance to unlock the door to our innermost secrets? Was this dream a chance to learn, to grow as a human being?

Nah, I’m pretty sure it was just bad pizza and a recent viewing of the Wizard of Oz…